♥ Daily Blog: Mk!

Tomorrow (or should I say today) will be a very BERRY busy day.

...stupid photoshop. and where the heck is my own photo edit software cd? ugh...sister really needs to clean out her mess on her computer desk...my cd is forever lost in there...

and now...i think i'm insane and a crazy girl.

I'm going around and apologizing to people. I actually feel a bit better...

i want to have a good character...

it may be too late...it may be at the wrong time...and it may not mean anything anymore...but I just want to apologize...

I'm not the same Jennifer anymore. And...in a few more hours...I won't be the person I am right now either. So...I will spend these last few hours writing letters to Maria and Tiff...they can throw my letters away...find the letters meaningless...but...I want to do something...I just want to prove myself that I do have a heart and I do appreciate them very much...more than they will ever know.

And even though...I have a lover whom I put in front of all things...I will never forget the ways that they have done...to make me strong enough...to bear what I have to bear now.

and as much as i hope that things can be different...and that he can understand me and consider my feelings...as much as I wish i can tell him what's been haunting me...and what new things that have bothered me...i know that I cannot tell him...i don't want him stressed out...i don't want him to endure them...

i just want my love one to be happy...and have nothing to worry about.

i just want him to look at the good memories of us...and smile...and i am happy that he has let go of the past...i really hope he has done so completely...for i have apologized...and hey...

at least he never went through what i've gone through...

i am glad that i was the guinea pig...and i will never do the same thing to him...