♥ Daily Blog: Ugh

I gained weight. My stomach is big. I know so bc i checked.

Father yelled at me at the restaurant today. I cried silently, drank my tea quickly. I choked on my food and wet my whole napkin.

I was supposed to get fish sauce, but they forgot to get one for me. So I ate my meal dry while I cried silently.

Family life is terrible.

Even my love life doesn't make anything better when it should be.

I wish I can hide from everyone for a few years.

I feel weird whenever he mentions college.

Then again...he'll have fun and enjoy his school.

He's ahead of me now in math. He'll be ahead of me in japanese too.

I wish I am naturally slim so I don't have to spend time working out and not being able to sit for hours and focus.

Someone aimed me up and asked, "You and Tuan are back together?"

I just answered, "Um yeah. Why do you ask?"

For a while, there was no response. Finally the person typed back, "lol i see. jw."

looks like some girl likes him.

then again, there is a guy right now who likes me too.

but then, i don't flirt and i tend to keep my distance and i don't talk to them.

while my lover is the complete opposite of me.

i guess i'm not fully secured yet.

but...no matter...i can keep on smiling and pretend that i'm happy. he won't notice. success.

stupid memories coming back. i'll never be healed. this is bad.