♥ Daily Blog: Reminiscing (Pt.3)

Today was interesting. He showed up in my first period class and even bought me breakfast -_-

He didn't talk to her at all today. Strange. I wonder how long he can keep this up.

And after school, he took me to Photosticker by surprise. Oh yeah...Tori bit me >.<

The pretty star case wasn't there...I wonder if I'll ever get it?

But I had a different case...and it's very pretty....

There are some things I still have on my mind...and this time, I'll just ask him straightforward.

I looked through the yearbook...and I almost cried. The guy I fell in love with was in the picture. His senior picture was very handsome. I love his hair. That day...it was just a day before my registration day. At least...I have a picture to remember him by. As for the men's league pic, he was handsome too. He looked very nice, proper, and idk. For some reason, why does everytime my body is next to him, there's a feeling of belonging. I feel as if he and I are meant for each other...

But...if he really understands how I feel and wants me to be happy....why aren't we going out...

Even when he does all those things to me...I just don't feel secure. I enjoy them...but I feel insecure. Furthermore, we can't share kisses nor can he hold me whenever he walks with me.

I must say that I enjoy a lot of outside affection. They may not be everything, but they sure make me feel happy and loved.

I don't know anymore.

His tone of voice...not there anymore. I remember the way he would speak ot me...makes me feel special because he only uses that tone toward me. His voice would be soft, gentle, and very sweet.

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Oh yeah...I tried to carry Tori, but he climbed up my hand and got out. He ran around, and I thought I lost him. I was close to tears, for even when I found him, I couldn't carry him. I tried to catch him for two whole hours. He never showed up. I almost cried. He really loves Tori...if I lost his "kid," his trust in me will be forever broken. Furthermore, my last hope to see my lover again will go down the drain. I was tired. So, I just sat at my desk. After a few minutes, I heard a noise.

Tori was under my bed in the corner. Apparently, he found my rolled up poster and thought it was a tunnel. He used my bed sheet as a door and the "tunnel" was his house. It was adorable. I tried to catch him...but he looked scared. I kept trying but...he ran away. So, I got up and went back to my desk. I just sat there and waited. Finally, I heard a scratch. Tori was still where he was. He was just hiding. Finally, I just got up and pick up my rolled up poster with Tori still in it. I carefully lowered one side of the poster down to the box and Tori jumped down. Yes. Now I don't have to worry about his "dad" being mad at me >.<

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T: besides if someone were to judge you by ur appearance, you would be so fine

T: personally, i think u look nice and ur personality is extremely good xP

T: being pretty is good
T: being hot isn't so much
T: get it? xP
T: being pretty means that you look nice and have class
T: hot means that u are gaudy or too "showy"
T: im sorry but u are not hot :p

T: lol that's why girls show it off
T: that's why they are "hot"
T: but u don't show urs off, u dress appropriately

T: hahah well i don't think i'm ever gonna get someone xDD
J: aw
J: how come
T: cause im picky and sometimes u don't always get the person that you want most
T: and i'm not really "open" to anyone, they have to fit what i like

T: u seem faithful :p
J: i am
T: some guys will kill to have that
J: nah
J: you're just saying that
T: lol no
T: thats what i like too xP
T: cause like i said...
T: beauty doesn't last forever, but faithfulness does

T: i'm still friends with them but with little trust
T: u have kept a good hold of it so far
T: thtats really special to me xP

T: well i promise that i will not lose u xP
J: haha
J: promise is a big word
T: well i'm pretty certain about this one :p

T: i have to say that as a person i like u very much

T: i would try to notice the things that u do for me
T: as best as i can
T: and i will do my best not to hurt u in anyway

T: ur the first person that i actually told about my dad xP

T: haha cause i feel like i don't want to get u mad
T: I like u to be happy =]

T: i'll kidnap u afterschool
T: and then i'll make a call to ur parent
T: "i have ur daughter"
T: "follow instruction carefully and she will be fine"
T: "make sure she gets 3 meals a day and make sure she eats"
J: o.o
T: haha ur parent will be like "is this guy for reals?"
J: hahaha
T: "he kidnaps her so she can eat?"
J: rofl

T: fine
T: i'll get a knife
T: walk closer to u
T: pull out the blade
T: and cut u an apple :]

T: well if ur uncomfortable and u have doubt, i like u to say it so i can clarify things x.x

T: well i care about ppl feelings, and urs is no diff
T: in fact, ur more special than other ppl xP
T: well ur sensitive yes
T: and i want to be really careful around you
T: wat i say and wat i do

T: love is an emotion, and it only makes sensse if u are willing to open urself to that person

T: hahaha well carefully pick someone who really cares about u and be true to u

J: i thought u only stick to one person
J: my mistake
T: i do
J: that explains a lot
T: when i find her
J: ic
T: i do stick to one person
T: plus i don't try anything with anyone, only when i actually find the person i like, then i'll get close

J: lol
J: get buff
T: hahah sure jen, just for u xP

T: cause tbh, in my life i have nvr found anyone that can relate to me the most, and it seems ur pretty close
T: sometimes u have doubts about me but its understandable

T: its hard to build up trust
T: and once i earn urs, i hope its worth it
T: well i'm pretty sure it is

T: well i do appreciate u caring about what i eat xD
T: at least that shows that u care about me (even a tiny bit) xP

T: haha well it's kinda good to be a lady
T: just have to look pretty and wait for the guys to come after u xDDD

T: cause even if there is pain, u might find someone who is compatible with u and he might (dare i say it?) be with u for a long time

T: id rather have an honest person that tells me i'm ugly than a person who lies and gives me a false secruity

T: hahahaha
T: chill girl i got ur back ;P

T: and i hate to see u walk home with all those books
T: haha well, if u want i can drive u home once i get a car xP

T: well its cause i care x
T: and i don't want u to be look by other guys who make u feel uncomfortable

T: plus u'll feel safe with me xDD

T: well, i know u have lots of things that are bad in ur life xP
T: and i want to be a solution to some of those problems, if not then at least help u with it

T: hahaha well now i want u to know how it feels to be cared by others xP

T: with u i'll be on my best behavior on my worst mood xP

T: hey jen...u know wat?
T: well i want u to know that ur the first person who actually stay up this late with me
T: sure ur doing ur own thing
T: but at least u helped me out
T: and not just focus on urself alone

T: haha well i don't think any friend ever went this far b4 xP
T: to help me at this late
T: and not worry about their own thing
T: haha idk
T: i just see u as a better person than i ever did b4

T: i just appreciate ur time and effort soo much

T: but u know ur time and effort means alot to me and i'll save and treasure every moment :P
T: and no...it's not the sleepiness talking, Tuan is talking

J: either u accept me for who i am
J: or not haha
T: i do
T: and i totally love who u are xP
T: even though ur quiet i wouldn't change a thing about u

T: haha i like to see a smiling jen not a tired one :P

T: haha tbh...for some reason ur smile always brighten up my day
T: maybe it's b/c u rarely smile and when u do its kinda special xP

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october 24 will be posted tm

when will something happen...is anything going to happen

~jen-jen