♥ Daily Blog: Unexpecting

AP tests all day today.

I just realized that I saw him all throughout the day.

Unexpectedly, my feelings are going to freeze up sooner than I have planned.

His tracker failed so many times today. Furthermore, he seems so happy without the relationship.
Unlike Hana Yori Dango, the guy, in this case, CAN be okay without the girl.

He doesn't truly love me, and I can see that. As I have written...
True love is not being with someone because you think you can be happy with that person, but because without that person you know you can never be...

Apparently, he's okay with people knowing that JayTee doesn't exist anymore...
R came up to me and asked if everything's okay. As always, I smiled to hide my true emotions. But...he smiled to me and said..."It CAN happen. It's possible." The thing is...it's because it happened to him already. They both love each other.

In my case, it's only one way. I'm not assuming, but the more I think about it, the more I feel as if I'm right.
His tracker doesn't work any more at all. He walked right pass me and be with his friends.

Furthermore, how can you own anyone if you already broke up with that person. Moreover, reading my messages and emails...I bet he won't even let ME do the same to him.

Telling me to wait for him and never showed back out. Good thing I didn't really care that much and I just walked off.

The only real thing he can truly hurt me is by not truly loving me. If there's true love, there won't be physical harm, selfishness, carelessness,etc. If there's true love, one will always try to make the other happy. And if the other is sad, talk to that person and cheer that person up. We're human. We're bound to cry every now and then.

Feelings...please freeze up soon. After that, I can be back to being alone as usual. After that, I don't want to know what love is.

And if he's really happy without me, which he is (I mean, seriously, as much as one can try to be happy, there will be sadness somewhere..but I see nothing. I'm not even first anymore and I have no hold of him.)...then I'm going to have to distance myself eventually if he no longer loves me.

I'm glad that he's treating me like everyone else, but at the same time, I'm just another person and nothing special.

To think about it, one will treat the person he or she loves more special while being him or herself at the same time.

Feelings...freeze up..freeze up soon.